Gravity Falls OneShot - (Double Dippin' AU) Mono? More Like Trio
by spywi
Summary: Tumblr Prompt: I wish you would write a fic where Dipper, Mabel and Tyrone all suspiciously come down with mono at once, and have to concoct wild tales as to how this could have happened so their parents don't become suspicious. :33 [I had a lot of fun researching this and writing for this AU. Hopefully I can write more about this AU in the future.]
Gravity Falls [OneShot] – (Double Dippin' AU) "Mono? More Like Trio, Am I Right?"

 _Tumblr Prompt: I wish you would write a fic where Dipper, Mabel and Tyrone all suspiciously come down with mono at once, and have to concoct wild tales as to how this could have happened so their parents don't become suspicious. :33_

* * *

"How in the world did this happen?!"

Mrs. Pines was standing over Dipper, Mabel and Tyrone, who were all sprawled on the various couches in the living room. All of them cocooned in blankets and had wet towels over their foreheads. Mabel and Ty were coughing, and Dipper was rubbing the side of his head due to a splitting headache.

"How is it that the doctor diagnoses all three of you with _Infectious Mononucleosis_ at the same time? I can understand one of you at a time, but all three at once?! This is unheard of! You three had better give me a good explanation for this before your father gets home."

The triplets flinched. Their father was a good quiet man, but man, he can get scary when he needed to be. They glanced at each other, wondering what they should say. Certainly not the fact that the three of them have been having makeout sessions with each other in Ty's room. Nope, definitely not that. While Dipper and Mabel wracked their brains, trying to come up with a solution, Ty gave another couch before saying,

"Well, I think I was the first one to get it."

"And how exactly did you come to get mono? Were you _kissing_ somebody, Tyrone?" their mother inquired.

"Y-Yeah, of course I was, mom, you know how I am with the ladies," Ty chuckled weakly, making shooting gun gestures at their mom and winking. She was not amused. Ty continued,

"No but seriously, mom, the disease can be shared through sneezes as well, like the doc said. There was this thing that happened in the locker rooms last month where some idiots *cough* were trying to see if they could stack someone on top of somebody else who was doing a handstand, and I was watching, and the guy tower fell over and the top guy sneezed at that exact moment, right in my face. I was covered in snot and -"

"Okay, okay, Ty, I get it. You don't have to go into that much detail. Mabel, honey, your turn. Any _boys_ or _parties_ that I should be aware about?"

"Moooom!"

"Don't _Moooom_ me, young lady. You've had your fair share of dates in the past, any one of the recent ones could have been the cause."

Mabel groaned, trying to conceal the worried expression on her face. Sure, she had gone on a few dates recently, but those were only to throw off any suspicions that she was fooling around with her own two brothers in secret.

"Seriously, mom?" she wheezed. "You're gonna make the girl with swollen lymph nodes explain stuff?"

"As long as you're awake, you can give the short and simple explanation."

"'Kay," Mabel said, immediately closing her eyes and pretending to snore.

" _Mabel,_ " their mom said slowly and angrily. Mabel opened one eye and giggled, which brought a twinge of pain across her temples.

"Ow, ow, owiee . . ."

"Short and simple, and then you can sleep."

"Fine, mom. No boys, no kissing, nothing like that. I . . . um . . . I"

"We were making cookies later that same week," Ty cut in. "Mabel wanted me to test-taste a new recipe, and I choked on the abundance of sprinkles, so she might have caught it when I was coughing."

"Y-Yeah! What he said!" said Mabel, her blushing face masked by her fever. It wasn't entirely a lie, as they had indeed been making cookies last month, but what wasn't mentioned was the fact that the triplets had decided to have some "fun" with the leftover cookie batter in the bedroom later that night. _No, bad Mabel! Suppress the memory for now, don't get turned on now!_

"Hmmph," said their mom, squinting at her. After about a minute, she shrugged, and then turned to Dipper. Ty and Mabel let out a breath.

"I accidentally used Ty's toothbrush," said Dipper plainly. Mabel and Ty twisted their positions to gape at him.

"Such a normal response, compared to the two of you. See, that wasn't so hard, now was it? Mabel? Tyrone?"

"Yes mom," the two of them glumly recited. Placated for now, their mother exited the room to go greet their father at the door. Mabel tossed a pillow in Dipper's direction.

"Really? Toothbrush? That's the best you could come up with?"

"It wasn't that hard. Mono's spread the most through saliva, so Ty's toothbrush is the most logical solution given that we all share a bathroom."

"Yeah, but I was the one that had to come up with all those scenarios on the spot, and I was panicking," Ty whined. "How're you so good at hiding secrets all of a sudden?"

"Easy. Mom will believe the most logical scenario because she's not an idiot. Ty's explanation could be true, but the timing of it is just too much of a coincidence. Mabel almost gave it away following up on your cookie story, and since mono takes like a month before the symptoms start showing, it's not likely that Mabel's symptoms would show up exactly when yours did, Ty."

"But," Ty started, but Dipper waved him down while coughing into a paper towel.

"Look, if we're gonna be able to continue doing, um well, _us,_ then we gotta be more careful about these kinds of things, got it? I don't want mom freaking out on us any more than she needs to. Are we clear?"

"Roger, Major Dippington!" saluted Ty, grinning weakly.

"As you command, High-Prince Dipstick!" Mabel followed suit, waving the wet towel from her forehead, and then stopping as fatigue started to settle in deeper. Dipper rolled his eyes at the two of them.

 _That was a close one,_ he thought. _Now to make sure our cover stories are the exact same when Dad asks us what happened._


End file.
